I knew I was going to do a first look before I was even engaged. I had been blogstalker of Root Weddings for quite some time when I came across the post they did on their first look. Initially I thought that it wasn’t for me, but by the end of that post, my mind had been changed. The pros they listed outweighed any concerns I had and the kicker was learning that seeing each other before the ceremony is not actually bad luck, but was a way to make sure grooms didn’t skip out on their future wife if she was ugly back in the ol days. Ok, maybe the real kicker was the fact that Jensey said she likes those brides a little bit better, but still, the other points played their part.
Fast forward to when my then boyfriend finally decided to put a ring on it and marry me. One of the first things I let him know during wedding planning was that we would be doing a first look. He’s super laid back and he agreed instantly, as I figured he would. That was the easy part, the hard part was ahead of me…..I had to tell my mom. I knew telling her wasn’t going to be a walk in the park, so I prepared by making sure all of the blog posts that Nate and Jensey had done on First Looks were pulled up on my phone and took her out for wine (because wine makes everything better). I will never forget her reaction – we were sitting on the patio of the restaurant, on our second glass of wine and I said something to the effect of: ‘Umm, just so you know, J.W. and I decided that we want to do a first look before the wedding. It’s amazing and Nate and Jensey will be there to capture the whole thing and it’ll be awesome because it’ll be a special moment for J.W. and I to enjoy’ To which she started balling. At the restaurant. It wasn’t even a slow cry that built up to actual crying; it was immediate tears flooding out. Which happened to be the exact time our waitress came out to check on us (of course). After assuring the waitress that I did not just deliver some horrible life altering news – although my mother disagreed – I pulled out my phone and had my mom read the same post that had changed my mind. But she just was not on board. She couldn’t believe that she wasn’t going to be there to witness when the bride and groom first saw each other. She was positive our reactions when I walked down the aisle wouldn’t be as emotional as they would if we waited to see each other. She KNEW she was going to miss that *one* special moment she was so looking forward to. While I was not a fan of upsetting my mom since she’s amazing and was doing everything for our wedding, doing a first look was something that I was not going to budge on. So in the following months, I continued to try to tell her all of the benefits of a first look, I emailed her photos of other first looks and how amazing they were, but there was no changing her mind either. While she was ‘ok’ with it, and wanted me to have my wedding the way I wanted, I knew she was still upset and this was going to just be something we didn’t agree on.
So, come our wedding day, I left the room early to go down and see my soon to be husband. It was amazing! Everything I hoped for. We were able to kiss and hug and tell each other how beautiful/handsome the other looked and how much we loved each other. We were also able laugh, get rid of some wedding day anxiety and enjoy the calm before the storm, just the two of us. During our first look, I cried, J.W. did not. But do you know when J.W. did cry? When I walked down the aisle to marry him. And I cried more than I did at our first look. Walking down that aisle to be married to my best friend was an emotional experience that cannot be replicated. I had different tears, different emotions than when I saw him a few hours before. My mom got to see that *one* look she was hoping for. She missed nothing and saw everything. And her favorite pictures from the entire day……are from our first look =)